An Atypical Rant

It figures...

2009-01-27T19:40:00.000-08:00

I very rarely go anywhere without a camera. You never know when something amazing might catch your eye. It was just a trip to Lowes, less than 15 minutes away, what could possibly happen. Traveling north on Route 2 just through the “narrows” I see this bird flying north. It didn’t have the same movement nor the size of any bird I had seen before. Then it turned - an American Bald Eagle.

I slowed as much as possible without getting run over, and watched for a few seconds. Absolutely amazing…………………and no camera. As I drove on I began to doubt what I saw and tried to convince myself that it wasn’t a bald eagle, but a large osprey. I told a friend about it and he said it was probably an osprey as well. That made me feel better about not having a camera with me. Until tonight. I got a call from Dad, who had also told me it was probably an osprey. He had been meaning to tell me that there have been several articles in the paper about people seeing a bald eagle along Route 2 north of the narrows.

Damn.

2009-01-16T22:05:00.000-08:00

As we say goodbye to President George W. Bush, I would like to extend my sincerest gratitude to him. Now, I do not agree with some of things he and his administration has done, but I cannot thank him enough for keeping my family safe. I offer him and his family a fond farewell. Thanks W.

Time

2008-11-05T19:40:00.000-08:00

My uncle passed away a couple of days ago, and although I was not very close to him, his unexpected death has hit home. We always think there will be time to do this, time to see that or time to mend fences. My uncle had two children who, for whatever reasons, no longer spoke to him. I would see my uncle during holidays and occasionally we would bump into each other. He would always speak fondly of his boys and that he missed them. He would always say that he should reach out and contact them, but he never really did. Tonight at the funeral home his boys showed up. I cannot express the sadness in watching them stand in front of their father, knowing that they have not seen him or even spoken to him in many years.

I don’t know what caused the riff, and honestly, I don’t care. What I do know is that there is never enough time. There are so many things that we put off thinking that we will eventually get to it, but never do. I am not talking about the dripping faucet or the hole in the soffitt. I am talking about the things in life that matter, spending time with loved ones, reaching out and healing emotional wounds, helping those less fortunate or establishing a relationship with God.

My cousins are two very nice and thoughtful people. I only hope that they don’t come to regret all of the missed time with their Dad - the missed Christmas mornings, the backyard BBQs and even just the simple conversations about sports or the weather. Something tells me that eventually that day will come. Time marches on, relentlessly.

All Good Things Must Come to an End

2008-11-03T18:34:00.000-08:00

Well, the day we have been waiting for is finally here. Two years of politics, debate and the media. This is now the third presidential election that I will partake. I can honestly say that I have never voted for a candidate, I always cast my lot against the candidate I favor the least. This year will be no different.

Where are all the great leaders of America? Unfortunately, those people are not welcome by the left/right wing cooks that have taken control of both parties. Somebody that actually makes sense, that understands where this country is and where it needs to be heading. It is long past time for a legitimate third party to come into the fold.

I don’t know what tomorrow brings, but I will cast my vote around 7 pm wishing there was at least another option – knowing that four years from now I will be able to post this same exact entry. The more things "change", the more they stay the same.

How to.....Successfully Drink Noni Juice

2008-06-12T20:31:00.001-07:00

I have started taking a daily dose of Tahitian Noni Juice. For those of you who are unaware of this Polynesian fruit, it is considered by many to be a very powerful medicinal supplement. It is known for lowering blood sugar levels, clearing up many types of infections and is currently being studied as a possible cure for some cancers. I encourage you to do your own due diligence and vet it out. http://www.tahitiannoni.com/

Sounds too good to be true doesn’t it? Well there is a catch, it tastes like hell. My wife, however, loves it…………she’s nuts, it’s awful and that is putting it nicely. So I have created a kit and a step by step procedure to successfully take my daily dose of noni without hurling it into the kitchen sink.

The kit consists of a glass, a stick of minty gum, noni, and a water source.

First – Prepare by placing the bottle of noni, glass and a stick of gum (unwrapped) on the counter.

Second – Pour your daily dose into the appropriate sized glass (for me it’s a shot glass – my wife uses an 8 ounce glass……again nuts)

Third – Turn the kitchen faucet on and let cold water run.

Fourth – Pinch your nose so that you are forced to breath through your mouth

Fifth – Down your noni as quickly as possible only faster.

Sixth – DO NOT LET GO OF YOUR NOSE.

Seventh – Immediately fill your glass with cold water and vigorously swish then swallow, STILL HOLDING NOSE.

Eight – Repeat step seven.

Nine – DO NOT LET GO OF YOUR NOSE, quickly begin chewing the gum as if your life depended on it, because it does.

Tenth – After chewing vigorously for ten to fifteen seconds, let go of your nose.

Nothing to it. You will still get a faint taste of the horrendous liquid from hell, but you’ll feel better, possibly.

Grammar.......Shmammar

2008-06-12T20:07:00.000-07:00

Wow, it’s been a while. When I began this blogging thing, I didn’t realize that it would turn into a lesson in grammar. As a “math guy” my interest and knowledge in grammar is….let’s just say I am not smarter than 5th grader when it comes to punctuation, adjectives and prepositions. I can, however, type a run-on sentence with the best of them, as you are witnessing right now with this fine piece of literature. My lovely wife, who is borderline OCD about proper spelling and punctuation, actually proofed my first couple of posts. What she didn’t realize is that after she finished I still went in and changed a couple of things. Sometimes it just sounds better even though it is incorrect. So moving forward my posts will no longer be proofed. I may sound illiterate, ignorant and uneducated, but I am from West Virginia.

Oh by the way, being from West Virginia, I am also an inbred bigoted sexist. At least that is according to the media and Vice President Dick Cheney. That is for another day.

Genuine and Honest -- Rare

2007-12-08T20:27:00.000-08:00

It has been a long time since I sat and talked with someone who is 100% sincere and 100% genuine. A couple of weeks ago I talked with a friend that I haven’t seen in over a year. This is a man that does not have a steady job, has very little money and very little education. He is a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. Knowing that, I still can’t help but envy this man. He knows who he is. He does not let the pressures of today’s society influence him. He accepts what life hands him and embraces it without complaint. Could he do better? Probably, he is an intelligent and sensible person. But he is content being who he is. Talking to him is like a breath of fresh air.

I know a handful of recovering addicts and there is one commonality with all of them – they know who they are. Funny how losing one’s self control seems to lead to the discovery of self. I’m sure it is not true for all addicts, and I know there are those who have never hit rock bottom that are genuine. I’m just saying, it seems odd that some of us spend our entire lives criticizing or ignoring people of addiction, when in the end, it’s that type of person we long to become.

Thanks for the talk Ben.

Shut up and do something

2007-10-30T20:14:00.000-07:00

Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah CNN blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Fox News blah blah blah blah blah Bush blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Pelosi blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Clinton blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Limbaugh blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Democrats blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Republicans blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Liberals blah blah blah blah blah blah Conservatives blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Maher blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Romney blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Obama blah blah blah blah blah Left wing blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Neo-cons blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

Yep…………that ought to do it.

Season of change

2007-10-30T20:05:00.000-07:00

Ah, the colors of fall. It is without a doubt my favorite time of the year. Last week, my work led me through the southern part of Ohio from the Ohio River to just east of Cincinnati. I was surprised by the beautiful landscape that welcomed me during the trip. The yellows, reds and greens were perfectly matched. It was probably one of the best fall displays I have seen in years.

As I mentioned, fall, for me, is the best time of year. It is a time of the year that traditionally signals a slow down of the hectic construction schedule and a time to spend more quality time with family. And for those of us who are privileged to live in a daylight savings time zone, fall signals the roll back of the clock. Which I must admit, I love. With two young ones at home, I welcome the early onset of “pit dark”, as my youngest calls pitch dark. A chance to take a break from the annual summertime rat race is always well received.

The problem is my favorite time of year is without a doubt my other half’s least favorite. She absolutely hates fall and winter. She is a person that craves the sun. As I am reveling in my delight, she is getting her seasonal lamps ready and has notified me that our electric bill is about to increase exponentially. Luckily, the kids have been getting good at leaving every light on in the house, so maybe she won’t notice the change this year. So, as I am stocking up on light bulbs, installing a new generator for more power and trying not to cause any imbalance in a household literally teetering on the edge, I welcome the change.

At least I thought I did.

Welcome to West Virginia.......Stay tuned (Updated)

2007-10-30T19:50:00.000-07:00

West Virginia – Almost Heaven, Open for Business, The Mountain State, or Wild & Wonderful. This is what we in West Virginia have been discussing for months now. The governor, when he took office, decided to change the slogan from “Wild & Wonderful” to “Open for Business” in hopes of attracting new and expanding companies. Needless to say, this did not go over very well, costing the state tax payers approximately $50,000 to change the 107 signs that adorn the roadways entering the state. The solution – let’s take time for the government to conduct an open poll and let West Virginians voice their opinions. The first poll “Should West Virginia welcome signs have a new slogan?” Results of the poll – yes. Second poll “What should the slogan be?” By the way, this will cost an additional $50,000 of the taxpayers’ money, not to mention the expense the government had in setting up the polls and in presenting the winning slogan to the legislature in 2008 to create the new law.

Let’s take a moment and review the four slogans. One -almost heaven- how do we know? Look, I love the state of West Virginia, but if this is almost heaven then I’ve got a bone to pick with Big Guy upstairs. Two - open for business - yeah…..so is every other state in the nation. States are constantly luring large companies to break ground within their boundaries. I don’t think the CEO of Little Pink Elephants, Inc. is going to have a V8 moment while crossing the Ohio River and seeing that slogan on a welcome sign. Three - the mountain state - I know that it is one of the state’s knick names, but what about Colorado, North Carolina or Tennessee. I guess when I think of mountains, I don’t think of West Virginia. Fourth - wild and wonderful - this was the original slogan that welcomed travelers. Wild? Certainly, especially if you find yourself in Morgantown during a couch lighting ceremony. Wonderful? Well, it is not the first adjective that comes to my mind when I think of West Virginia.

Like I said before, I love West Virginia, but it’s a state that only a native can love sort of thing. With all of the bad, there is a lot of good, but that is not the topic of this post. So as West Virginia schools continue to fall behind the national average, as the state’s highway system continues to deteriorate, as state workers continue to lose benefits , and as the landscape continues to get raped for coal, you should come and visit West Virginia late next year and check out our new signs. Perhaps the new state signs should read, “Welcome to West Virginia – We suck at everything, but we have these new signs.”

Update 11-1-07: Well, West Virginia is no longer "Open for Business." West Virginia is once again "Wild, Wonderful." That is, if the legislature will adopt the new slogan into law during the upcoming spring session. Reading through some of the early suggestions for the new slogan was my favorite "Welcome to West Virginia..........It's all relative."

When?!!!

2007-10-16T19:07:00.000-07:00

It’s a day like today that venting my frustration on the blogosphere seems appropriate. Screaming and stomping would work. But when there is nobody in the office to hear such an expletive-saturated tirade, it’s just not much fun. So, I decided to post my frustrations in hopes that pounding the keyboard will alleviate my desire to rip someone in half.

This is not the subject matter I intended for my first post. However, I felt it necessary to discuss. In a span of fourteen minutes I had three phone calls, two emails and a fax that ended with four very overused letters – ASAP. Everything has to be done as soon as possible. In today’s technology driven world, what used to take days, now takes seconds. You can email a file and have it reviewed and sent back all before lunch, unlike the days of old when you counted on those couple of days it would take to get through the USPS. Instead of ending a fax or email with a “please” or “thank you,” the majority now end with ASAP.

When is “as soon as possible?” Does it mean immediately? Does it mean I need to jump on this project right after my nap or after playtime? Does it even matter anymore? With everyone asking for theirs "as soon as possibe", it all gets lumped together. I just made a new pile on the corner of my desk and refer to it as the ASAP pile, which is right next to the PDQ pile and in front of the FYI pile. (Acronyms are for another day.)

I apologize for the rant, especially on the first post. I promise I will not make it a habit. Instead, I’ll try to write about things that make me laugh, things that make me think, things that make me cry and obviously things that make me mad. Nothing is out of bounds. Next entry to come. . . ASAP.